Archive.The Future.Sign.Diaryland

Sunday, Aug. 25, 2002

Do Your Own Thing (Finale)

I never thought I would ever do this. I was in love with diaryland. Still am. Yet, I feel the need to jump onto the bandwagon and join the bloggers out there. I have the stuff it takes to make my own domain, something I have wanted to do for a while and I have made it my mission to stick with an idea for once.

I have decided to try harder in school. To hand in everything on time and to complete projects to the best of my ability, which is far more than I am making it to be. My goals may be high, though I believe them to be reachable. I have great faith in myself.

Reading back through some of my entries I see that there is so much going on through my head. There still is and it has to come out in some way. I just feel that I have changed enough that this won't do it for me anymore. There are still entries in here about a certain EX-boyfriend that I am trying deperately to shut out of my life. There are two summer's, completely different from one another yet in some ways the same.

I see myself in these pages made from pure hyper text mark-up language, yet I don't see myself at all. I've learnt to live up to my mistakes, meet them and beat them. Noone will make me feel bad ever again. You mess with me, you get a foot in the mouth. I would say I've grown more mature, but I haven't, not really. I'm beginning to think that maturity is a myth that some adult made up just to pressure people. I'm not sure why.

In exactly two years I will be graduating high school. Who knows where I'll be by then, but right now, I know exactly where I am. I know I'm myself. I know who I am. I have finally found myself. No strings attached.

I want to thank all of you who read me through my ups and downs. For signing my guestbook and letting me read what you had to say about it. I will come visit from time to time, but I believe this is the end for me. I must part ways.

Of course, we know this isn't goodbye. Just see you later. And it's really not the end either. It's just the beginning.

Please remember, and know that there's always a bright side, you just have to look for it.

For those who haven't read all my entries. Maybe you should. You might find something helpful along the way. See you.

xoxo

Lauren

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